347.life

YES, I'M A BAD AMERICAN

     by George Carlin

I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin.

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid level governmental functionary be it Democratic or Republican!

I'm in touch with my feelings and I like it that way, damn it!

I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer, it makes you a smart American.

I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not entitle you to anything.

I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, try to do it in English.

I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July.

I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the bill to put your pansy ass through 4 years plus of college, you haven't begun to be enlightened.

I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they want to.

My heroes are John Wayne, Babe Ruth, Roy Rogers, and whoever canceled Jerry Springer.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.

I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.

I think global warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now, when I'm freezing my ass off during these long winters and paying, paying, paying?

I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years In the desert after getting chased out of Egypt. I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you! So, shut-the-Hell-up already.

I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson practices, where he gets his money, and why he is always part of the problem and not the solution. Can I get an AMEN on that one?

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running from them.

I also think they have the right to pull your ass over if you're breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.

I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years.

I dislike those people standing in the intersections trying to sell me crap or trying to guilt me into making “donations” to their cause. These people should be targets.

I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents.

And what the hell is going on with gas prices… again?

If this makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American.

Simple Web Design GuidelinesThe following excerpt is from an email I sent to a client today. I typically do programming as opposed to a lot of layout and design, but I know what I look for when visiting or designing a web site.

In designing any web site, the key to the layout is consistency, ease of use, and minimalization. You want to make sure that on every single page of your site, the header, navigation, and overall layout are as identical as possible. The user should be able to quickly identify where the navigation of the site is in contrast to the content and the header/logo should be a clear indication of which site they visiting. In addition, the header & navigation should make up the least amount of space on a given page. The visual “punch” should come from the content and pictures used to illustrate the content. After all, the visitor usually comes to your site to read your content, not see your layout or how cool you navigation is arranged.

If you have PHP installed and you've loaded up 10. ….

If you have PHP installed and you've loaded up 10.2.4 you've probably noticed that PHP no longer works. By editing httpd.conf in the following way I was able to get PHP back and running. Disclaimer: I don't really know what I'm doing here, I'm just a guy armed with BBEdit and some vague notions. Follow my lead at your peril. That said:

1. Open httpd.conf in the text editor of your choice.
2. Find the following lines and uncomment them:
   #LoadModule php4_module libexec/httpd/libphp4.so
   #AddModule mod_php4.c
3. Find this line:
   Include /private/etc/httpd/users
4. And add this line right after it:
   AddType application/x-httpd-php .php
5. Save.
6. Open your System Preferences, go to Sharing and restart your web server.

PHP should be running again. At least, it is for me 😉 Discuss

10:03 AM
| Chris Cummer

[Forwarding Address: OS X]

Powerful Drunk Driving Ad

If you need a little wake-up-call about drinking and driving, this one is sure to do the job.

WARNING: Graphic Material

Download the PowerPoint Show here.

Safari Beta (v60)

It is out and better than ever. Is it just me, or does Safari get faster and faster with each download.

I have but one tiny request — WHERE ARE MY TABS!!

I have to think that the tab stuff has been already coded and tested, but they are waiting to take off the “Beta” label in order to share with us. I mean, honestly, is there a single person out there who doesn't like a solid tabbed interface?

Keep it up, Apple. I'm still your #1 fan.

KonfabulatorIf you're running OS X and you haven't yet downloaded Konfabulator, do so right away. These little widgets ROCK!! I have 7 of them running right now and they are simply awesome. The interface is veeeeeeeeerrrrrrrryyyyyyy slick. They blend in so well with the rest of my apps that they are quite unobtrusive.Konfabulator is brought to you by the same folks who wrote Kaleidoscope – the groovy little interface enhancer for the Classic Mac OS.You can get a single copy of Konfabulator for $25. I'll be registering mine soon. I took a look at the simple XML/JavaScript based .kon files used to write the apps. Amazing. If you're a gearhead and have a hankering to poke around and write some new widgets, dig in. It looks awefully straight-forward and I'm sure you'll find it's a walk in the park once you get started.Konfabulator. Get to know the name. You'll be hearing more about it soon.

Minimal BloggingBad News: I haven't been posting much lately.Good News: Business is going well, therefore, I'm swamped. Life is humming along at a good pace. Things are looking up on all fronts. I'd like to be “out of the woods”, but I'll settle for seeing daylight.

Snow in Austin

Well, it finally happened. We woke up this morning with snow! Albeit, not like the folks up North see it, but nonetheless, SNOW!!

Humor: What Company is this???Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than500 employees and has the following statistics:29 have been accused of spousal abuse7 have been arrested for fraud19 have been accused of writing bad checks117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses3 have done time for assault71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit14 have been arrested on drug-related charges8 have been arrested for shoplifting21 are currently defendants in lawsuits84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last yearCan you guess which organization this is?Give up yet?It's the 535 members of the United States Congress.The same group of Idiots that crank out hundreds of new lawseach year designed to keep the rest of us in line.

Key Xing 2.6 is Available

I cannot say this enough, “If you have OS X, you need Key Xing.” It only costs $7 and is, by far, one of the most useful programs on my Mac. John Scalo of LumaCode, the author, is a great guy and very responsive to feedback. He has implemented a couple of my requests already and is always eager for feedback.

Do yourself a favor. Go buy a couple of copies. Install one for yourself and then send another to a friend or client.

Key Xing 2.6. Key Xing is a Mac OS X program that allows users to launch programs, files, system actions, AppleScript scripts, and URLs from a keyboard. Changes in this version: New Google search window. Hot keys can now be activated only when certain programs are front-most. Fixed auto-version checking. User interface improvements to pref pane. Force quit is now disabled when the Mac OS X screen saver is active. Google searches with non-ASCII characters now work correctly. [AppleScript Info]